i must be better

I realised i have wasted most of 2009 on worthless and ultimately empty self pity and negative thoughts must aim to change that in 2010 on not my own strength but His (but must put in herculean effort of course). 2010 will be a better year a year where i will learn many more things to make up for my wasted years.

2010 WILL BE BETTER!!

Forgettable post from a forgettable person

i just realised how forgettable i am when a friend FORGOT me for his wedding. CRAP. enuff said.

This is my now

There was a time I packed my dreams away
Living in a shell, hiding from myself.
There was a time when I was so afraid
I thought I’d reached the end.
Baby, that was then.
But I am made of more than my yesterdays.

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can’t believe the love I see.
My fear’s behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.


I had to decide.
Was I gonna play it safe?
Or look somewhere deep inside,
Try to turn the tide.
Find the strength to take that step of faith?

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can’t believe the love I see.
My fear’s behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.

I have a courage like never before, yeah.
I settled for less, but I’m ready for more.
Ready for more…

This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can’t believe the love I see.
My fear’s behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now,
And I am breathing in the moment.
As I look around,
I can’t believe the love I see.
My fear’s behind me,
Gone are the shadows and doubt.
That was then.
This is my now.
This is my now.

On friends

Tdy i really felt that i have been dwelling too much in my state of loneliness, blinded to not see the truth that actually there is a lot of people who sincerely care about me and that i have many great friends(or potentially great friends) that i have been neglecting to deepen my friendship with....and i have been focusing too much on the negative rather than see the obvious. haha....

very much looking to the week ahead while looking back at the past...

I surrender all to You...

On relationships

the past 2 weeks have been ok...been thinking quite a bit about relationship and i figure i might sort myself out first before seriously getting into another one if i still have the energy to by then...cos the problems that might arise will be more than what i can handle...why like that? isnt it supposed to be happy and blissful? i really dont know...it has become more of a torturing thing to me...maybe i can change this mind set in time to come but for 7 months i am dropping this thought....working on myself for the time being.

today got another interview at a Co at Tanjong Pagar...as a consulant exec something related to planning....

Today worked 11-3 only...very shiok...i went to watch Arsenal vs Boro with Chris and his gf after he played his regular weekly football with Cis which i didnt join because i decided i will get some rest...so met them and talked random stuff(as we usually do) and went up to Chris house to wait while he got ready....watched a bit of Star Awards...must say this year they made it rather entertaining! So got down to watching the match proper...wasnt really very exciting but was good...shd go sleep now cos chest hurting after abt 2 hours of Sudden Attack (a CS type game)

SERIOUSLY MISS STUDYING!

And this is my prayer in the battle
And triumph is still on it's way
I am a conqueror and co-heir with Christ
So firm on His promise I'll stand

YES i will!

Results - 1 Apr 2009

Results came out on April Fools...dunno whether shd trust the results or not..hahah

Accounting - C
Audit - A

GPA: 3.302

Future: ??????

Haiz.

IQC Class Chalet cum graduation celebration!

Day 1 - 23 Mar

Met up with Joeii and Dishan to do some last min shopping at Sheng Siong before cabbing over to the chalet. Its at some ulu part of Pasir Ris park...next to a forest somemore! after a very long road in....and it was hot like hell....wah..
after that wait for yamei to come check in...then suddenly the uncle in the office(if you can call it that haha more like a home) asked for a copy of the receipt...which i didnt print cos my com broke down and i got a new one just days before today. Lucky Yamei's friend was able to fax over the receipt. So we went in and checked the stuff...sorta reminds me of the milltary...check this one and that one...so when that was done i was doing the finances for the chalet...after that dishan they all left for IRAS volunteering training and i left for work...can u believe it i still need to work....reached "home" at 11 pm...they bought orange juice from MACs and doughnuts for me too...thanks girls! really made me feel at home haha...then played heart attack and watched tv...

Day 2

Rented bikes and went out to Eillas mall to get the stuff that was missing (Drinks etc)...we rode in a single file and i felt relaxed and able to enjoy the wind and smell the roses...great feeling to have once in a while....dishan rented a bike! was really afraid she would aggravate her injury...she proved to be more than able to cycle...haha...also discovered yamei is strong when she long bang-ed Hwee Ting and Dishan for a long distance...hahah....rode last in line so that i can see all of them as we were riding really close to any incoming traffic...become safety officer ah...
We prepare the food for the BBQ and the malay gals cooked up a storm in the kitchen with the instant noodles that we bought...YUMMY! I was a bit lost on what to do as they were so efficient in doing everything...ended up doing random things! Great job girls!
So the fire started...and went off and repeated....Mdm salinah, his husband and one of her kids came to visit...bringing along a delicious cake from Hans...had a lot of fun playing ball with her kid...SO CUTE!!! But i not going to have kids of my own so fast though...hahah....the comical part was Mdm Salinah trying to give me $30 for the chalet but i insisted on not accepting...which i tot i succeeded in till they tell me Mdm Salinah dropped off the money at the front pouch after hugging someone...and it got passed back to me...aiyo! Cher! say invite you already still pay...but thanks cos the money really helped to clear all the food costs. =)

Some of us went for a night walk aftert that ..just a simple walk and talk. Then we went back to play volley ball..haha..at about 12 plus..some of us went to bathe..then everyone gather to play heart attack..played till 2 plus..still not sleepy so went up to our room to chit chat..haha..at about 3plus 4 we went to sleep..haha..really enjoyed the feeling of heart to heart chatting.

Day 3

Time to say good bye! I woke up at 8 plus if i rmb correctly...then walked bala out to take bus to work...this brother of mine deserves 10 out of 10 for effort...he cabbed down from work on Day 1 costing him $30 plus and on Day 2 came down even though it was very late already...and he needed to work both days! Take care bro!
So after bathed packed our stuff and handled the checking out and took group photos.

We shall have one more chalet!! Its in the works!